The solution is simple and I wrote an extensive guide on Umbrel forum:
Use Umbrel + Tailscale + lndhub
https://community.getumbrel.com/t/how-to-use-umbrel-with-tailscale/

Tor is unreliable for these things and also is useless to connect over Tor to your own node. You don't trust enough yourself?

I also strongly suggest to use the LNDhub from LNbits instead of the BW one. Works much better and you have even more options and features.

I wrote several guides about that:
https://darthcoin.substack.com/p/umbrel-node-lnbits
https://darthcoin.substack.com/p/the-bank-of-lnbits
https://darthcoin.substack.com/p/lnbits-for-small-merchants
https://darthcoin.substack.com/p/build-your-own-lnbits-app-server